Bacl to California

The days are counting down to my return to California and I cannot say I'm not panicking. I have no money to my name, I don't have a replacement roommate yet, and I don't know how to cope with moving back into my parents house. I know it's for the better, but I cannot escape a feeling of regret, of moving back several steps. This isn't the time to second guess myself and I won't.

I can go back to school now, and I can work on saving money to move back out. I can look for a healthy relationship, and I can use my money the way I want instead of paying rent. I cannot say for certain that I will come back to Seattle, but I know if I do, it won't be forever. L.A. is my home, and that's where I belong. I was silly to think otherwise.

Happy Thoughts...

Something

What a glorious morning! I feel pretty awake at the moment...kinda. My cup of coffee is here besides me and I am looking forward to the day, not my working day but just the day if that makes sense. Well that's it for now, here some good morning music for ya.

Monkey - Counting Crows

Don't Stop Believing - Journey

Avalon - Roxy Music

For no One - The Beatles

Holding out for a Hero - Emery

Folkin' Around - Panic! At the Disco

So folks have a good morning and a better day

Happy Thoughts...




P.S.

Sun It Rises

So as an early morning treat for you folks, I decided to post some really good morning songs to kick start your day.

Mother Mary - Foxboro Hot Tubs

Sick Muse - Metric

White Winter Hymnal - Fleet Foxes

Hella Nervous - Gravy Train

The Christians and the Pagans - Dar Williams

Sweet Disposition - The Temper Trap

Higher than the Stars - The Pains of Being Pure at Heart

Pot Kettle Black - Tily and the Wall

Hope y'all get a kick out of these songs, and your day is a pretty sweet.

Happy Thoughts...


P.S.

heres a little sample.

Ode to the Family.

So folks, here I am once more sitting and doing something that should never be done alone; Thinking.

Family seems to be something everyone has/needs right? I love mine, and would never wish for another one, however; for the last several weeks I have been going to church each Sunday with another family here in Seattle. I really enjoy church and the time I get with God, but I also enjoy the warmth of family I have been missing since I moved out here. The connections are very strong within the family, and I long for my own.

After mass each Sunday, the family and I usually go out to brunch at this small restaurant and enjoy a few hours of talking and enjoying each others company. The family consists of the Mother, Father, three Girls(one being my roommate) and two boys. I absolutely adore the youngest boy, he's I believe nine(9) and just a ball of fun! He reminds me of the boys I had at camp, eager to live and enjoy all the mysteries of childhood. For example, today was Easter and it was pretty packed at church. The boy, I'll call him Jake for anonymity's sake, just wouldn't sit still. He kept looking around, taking his gum out and playing with it. I must admit, I was getting frustrated, but when he would laugh and giggle it was OK. There was also a moment where he acted so mature, and did as was expected of him.

The other boy, Jack we'll call him, is in high school and swears he's the shit. It's funny to watch him act, and react to the people at church. He is so ready to become a man, yet holding onto childhood like a safety blanket. He thinks hes a "gangster" but beneath all that tough attitude there is a little boy. He was trying to be a thug by wearing a polo that was two sizes too big for him to church, but it looked like he was a baby wearing his fathers shirt. He's a good kid, he just needs a good kick in the pants every now and again.

This family is truly something, they almost feel like a second family to me. It pains me that I must go back to school and leave them behind, but I will see them again, if it's the last thing I do. Until the day I leave I will cherish every moment I can spend with them.

Happy Thoughts...
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